Category: Joke Board
This was shared by someone on facebook. freakin hilarious.
A dog Named Sex
Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me.
When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex.
He said, "I would like to have one too!"
Then I said, "But she is a dog!"
He said he didn't care what she looked like.
I said, "You don't understand. ... I have had Sex since I was nine years old."
He replied, "You must have been quite a strong boy."
When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding.
He told me to wait until after the wedding was over.
I said, "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex."
He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church.
I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding.
The next day we were married at the Justice of the Peace. My family was barred from the church from then on.
When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me.
When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex.
He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex.
I said, "You don't understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at night."
The clerk said, "Me too!"
One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away.
Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around.
I told him that I was going to have Sex in the contest.
He said that I should have sold my own tickets.
"You don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV."
He called me a show off.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog.
I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married but Sex left me after I was married."
The Judge said, "Same here!"
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking all over for her. A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning.
I said, "I'm looking for Sex." -- My case comes up next Thursday.
Well now I've been thrown in jail, been divorced and had more damn troubles with that dog than I ever foresaw.
Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist, she asked me, "What seems to be the trouble?"
I replied, "Sex has been my best friend all my life but now it has left me forever. I can't live any longer being so lonely."
And the doctor said, "Look mister, you should understand that sex isn't a man's best friend so go get yourself a dog."
lol.
Great! I love it!
I also saw this on Facebook. I raised a question which no one would answer:
"When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license,..."
From the context this dog is a pet. Why would a pet need a license?
People on Facebook laughed at me because they assumed that I didn't get the joke.
He probably meant for tags and such. Our dog is a pet and she still has paperwork and a licence so that she can wear tags with her address, etc. She also has one of those chips in her ear. As for the joke, it was clever and funny!
Yes, it's advisable to get tags for your dog, even if he or she is a pet. If they're registered with the city, it's more likely you'd get the animal back if they got loose and ran off. same idea with microchipping, but anyway, yeah, that joke was funny.
You always have to register a dog with the city hall. Where I live, if you have a pet dog and you don't register it, you can actually get fined. So yes, yuo do need to go to the city hall to get a license for your dog. It's a very real thing.
Lol on the joke.
One reason they may have laughed is that, based on how you asked the question, it sounds like you're referring to a driver's license. that puts an image in my head of a dog driving a car, or trying to get a driver's license, which is kind of amusing. But yes, the others are right, you do have to register and license dogs. I don't think you have to with cats.
I hadn't seen this joke circulating in a long time, but it is funny. Grins. Thanks for the laugh.